Welcome my friends, we are so excited you chose to listen to this episode. To be honest with you, this is probably way overdue. You may hear us talk about owning you mom life on just about every forum possible. But, we felt it would be good to give you a little encouragement by breaking down what it means or could mean if you truly owned your mom life.
So, the dictionary described the word OWN as the following…
To have (something) as one's own; possess.
You own your life. No one owns it but you. You could say this is my own family and my own mom life
another way to look at “own” is in it’s formal context…
admit or acknowledge that something is the case or that one feels a certain way.
For example, we are owning up to the fact we aren’t perfect as Mamas.
I really think to own your mom life is both of those. You are acknowledging your life in it’s current state and owning up to everything it is.
You are taking a gut check and asking yourself, how are you doing? What does life look like right now? The good. The bad. and the ugly.
You are then saying…
You know what, regardless of the flaws and the imperfections I possess this life. It is mine, it is no one else that can bring me happiness it is me myself and I, that can choose to be grateful and grace filled and content in the life that I have. So, I am going to choose to own this mom life.
Key things you should do if you want to get a state in which you truly own your mom life
- Find things that are good RIGHT where you are. Realize it isn’t and didn’t go according to plan, but that’s okay. “Expectation lessens gratitude” - so change your expectation. It doesn’t mean you that you shouldn’t want a clean house or a good job or a happy life… but rather understand that if your house is dirty and you are so frustrated that it isn’t clean even though you’ve picked up 10 times today alone, it’s okay. The good right there is that your kids played. They used their big little brains to grow and learn and create. What better gratification as a Mom is there than that. So, find the good right where you are.
- Ask yourself what you want your life to look like - and then ask is that where I am? How can I live more like that each day?
- When in a wounded state of confusion, exhaustion, disappoint, it is easy to blame others, but even when you feel like it is someone else’s fault, ask yourself, what can I do differently? What can I change in my thoughts and my actions? For example, say your husband is sick and goes into the bedroom while you are left to care for the kids and do all the work. It’s easy to think WTF when I’m sick I do everything and don’t get a break. Am I right Mama? But, what if we thought what can I do differently? Maybe it means you go take care of yourself in a room next time you are sick. Maybe it means, you are capable of handling things a little better and at this point in time we could choose to offer grace and comfort to the person who loves you most in life.
- Choose both - Sometimes we set such strict boundaries
- I want to be a good christian which means I shouldn’t idolize things but I love a good house and a good outfit - that’s okay to choose both!
- I want to be a good friend and go to their birthday party but I’m super tired and my kids are all sick - you can choose both - take your friend out to lunch on a day where it won’t drain you and stay home and get well
- I want to be healthy but that mexican food and that cookie look mighty good. Choose both. Exercise, eat mostly good and for pete’s sake give into the desire of the cookie and glass of wine. It’s okay!
- I want to be a REALLY good Mom and be with them as much as possible but I’m going a little insane and wish I could get out more or bring in some income or vice versa(maybe you want to stop working and stay home) - CHOOSE BOTH - create a life that uniquely fits you. You don’t need to fit the mold.
We need to realize that it isn’t a one size fits all, all or nothing, must do it perfectly or else we aren’t good enough.
Sometimes we are going to do good and sometimes we are going to say things that hurt others. But, that’s part of connection. And in life, all we want is connection to one another. So, let’s be vulnerable and positive in the belief and offering of grace and connection to one another. Be open to that and know that sometimes mistakes happen but if we can show others grace and even more important is show YOURSELF grace and realize you are NOT defined by your bad decision or mistake or mistep, or accident, then you will be that much closer to our whole mantra over here at Catch This Mama.